The amount of money at stake is relatively small — roughly $42,000 a year from the Alabama Public Library Service. Yet the debate surrounding those books has grown into something far larger: a cultural argument about parenting, publishing, and what material is appropriate for teenagers.

For most of modern history, the institutions shaping children’s reading habits were fairly predictable: parents, teachers, and local libraries. Today that ecosystem looks very different. Algorithms now recommend books to teenagers before a parent ever sees the cover. Viral social media posts can transform obscure novels into overnight bestsellers. In that environment, debates like the one unfolding in Fairhope are not simply about a handful of controversial titles. They are about whether communities still have a say in the cultural forces shaping the next generation.

At first glance the issue appears to be about “book banning.” Critics of the state’s policy argue that moving books out of teen sections can function as a soft form of censorship. Many librarians and free-speech advocates believe literature should be evaluated as a whole rather than judged by isolated passages and address serious issues such as addiction, abuse, racism, and trauma. From that perspective, restricting access may prevent young readers from engaging with difficult but important topics. But a closer look reveals a more complicated problem, one shaped by the modern publishing industry, BookTok, and a generation of parents struggling to keep pace with the media ecosystems shaping their children.

Meanwhile, the broader backdrop is troubling. American reading proficiency continues to decline while online platforms now play an enormous role in determining what young people read and why they read it. Communities built around hashtags and recommendation algorithms can catapult novels to bestseller lists almost overnight.

The question facing parents, librarians, and policymakers is not simply whether a particular book belongs on a particular shelf. It is whether the institutions guiding children’s reading habits are still aligned with the values of the families they serve.

The Publishing Problem

One of the most powerful forces in publishing today is the BookTok community on TikTok and similar circles on Instagram. These reader-driven movements have enormous influence over which titles publishers promote and which books climb bestseller lists. Made up of mostly women who indulge in romance stories ranging from fantasy, true crime, enemies to lovers, and beyond, they influence others to read their favorite books, usually filled with smut or storylines centered around promiscuous romantic endeavors. It’s basically a threshold for women’s phantasmic eroticism.

Thankfully, many Christian and classical book influencers are addressing this issue and offer other avenues to read and rediscover the beauty of legitimate literature. The publishing industry however, is not. In fact, they’re doubling down to market their trendy sexually explicit literature to teenagers.

Need proof? Just this week, popular YA novelist Melissa de la Cruz released her new YA fantasy novel, Sibylline. This novel is recognized as a New York Times bestseller, landed on Good Morning America’s YA Book Club Pick, is marketed for ages 14+, and is alleged to feature graphic scenes of necrophilia. Liza Libes, a classical book influencer posted this in response:

I simply ask: What value does this add to our children? We are driving the next generation away from developing core academic and interpersonal skills when we degrade them with lousy literature. Shout out to @official_abigailg.thompson @pensandpoison and @authorjaydenjelso for bringing awareness to this abject depravity.

But we cannot rely on influencers alone to protect children from these grievances. Multimedia empires vie for the attention of the next generation. Yet, parents and lawmakers have consistently chosen the ebb of culture over their own children’s protection. Culturally, this is an obvious issue. Practically and policy-wise though, what actually can be done about it? Do the values of the parents really echo those of the prominent BookTok influencers?

In the case of my home state of Alabama, surprisingly, the answer is yes.

Public Policy Problems

In early 2025, President Trump issued an executive order restricting federal agencies from using federal funds to promote what the order described as “gender ideology.” While the order did not directly regulate libraries, it contributed to policy discussions that later influenced state-level library rules.

A letter from the APLS sent to libraries throughout the state warned that noncompliance could affect grant eligibility. In the face of this possibility, most libraries rearranged sections which might fall into noncompliance with few complaints. However, one little library feigns compliance to this code, refusing to move “explicit” material out of the teen section and into the adult section.

Enter the Fairhope Alabama Public Library which has been fighting nearly a year’s long battle to retain 10 gender affirming and/or sex positive books in the teen section. The APLS has withdrawn state funding from the library because of their refusal to remove these ten titles into the adult section:

Beyond Magenta by Susan Kuklin

Crank by Ellen Hopkins

Doing It by Hannah Witton

Identical by Ellen Hopkins

Lighter Than My Shadow by Katie Green

Shine by Lauren Myracle

Sold by Patricia McCormick

The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood

The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas

The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky

An Al.com article reported, “In response to the loss of state funding, the Fairhope Library raised more than $98,000 in private donations as of last month. The library typically receives about $42,000 a year from the state, while the bulk of its roughly $1 million budget comes from the city.” Members of Read Freely Alabama, a nonprofit defending the Fairhope library stated Alabama law does not define “sexually explicit content” which sets “a much narrower test…requiring works to be evaluated as a whole and found to lack serious literary, artistic, political, or scientific value for minors.” John Wahl, chairman of the APLS makes a clear statement, “Across the challenged books, the f-word alone appears 184 times. This is not a close call, and it is not a matter of interpretation.”

On February 2nd 2026 the Fairhope Alabama Public Library voted to reaffirm their stance, leaving the controversial books in the teen section, continuing to operate without state funding. None of the books in question have been removed from the library and the dispute still centers on whether they belong in the teen section or the adult section.

Parental Protection

Despite the state’s best efforts to protect children from unseemly themes, it’s not their job nor could it ever accurately assess which books are age-appropriate for teens. Teenagers encompass a variety of maturity levels and only parents or guardians are entirely capable of assessing which material is actually appropriate for their teen. The library board can only serve as a decent guide for how to assess the literature appropriately. It becomes disheartening when a trusted community partner fails to accurately protect its young citizens.

Yet this example proves parents are less and less interested in monitoring the interactions and material their children digest. The result? Multimedia empires make boatloads of money catering to the desensitized interests of teens, allowing teenagers to learn about: sexuality, graphic depictions of sex, gender transitioning, eating disorders, etc. within the context of politically centric literature without parents ever knowing.

When the culture cries “book banning” and recites their right to “free speech” in the face of this mess, parents consent. This isn’t new information or even a new talking point, but to the concerned citizens of Fairhope Alabama, this is interconnected, prevalent, and disappointing.

The state of Alabama has adopted a new code to ensure the safety of their children rests in the parent’s hand. Written in the APLS admin code is a requirement for minors seeking to read books in adult sections that require parents to give approval in order to get a library card for their teen. In the case with Fairhope Library, if a parent encourages their child to read any of the material in the books mentioned above, the parent must give consent to access the adult section of the library. All the Fairhope Library would need to do is move the ten books referenced above into the adult section.

Library cards for minors under the age of 18 must require parental approval before that minor is permitted to check out materials from the adult sections of the library.
— Alabama Admin. Code § 520-2-2-.03(k)

Cultural debates about books often make reading itself feel like a battlefield. But the answer is not to stop reading—it’s to read better.

Speaking of which, you also read my Substack, The Kimberly Column, and you should continue to read it by considering a free subscription.

Subscribe now

Moreover, the most quoted love poems are from Shakespeare, Shelly, Keats, Byron, and Cummings—all men. There’s quite a charming reason for this.

Men and women interact differently based on how each experiences appreciation and care. Men have historically written many of the most enduring love poems because this poetry serves as a primary means of wooing. Through it, men attempt to make their feelings visible and to spark romantic interest. To do this successfully, they must meet women where they feel most appreciated—through her beauty, influence, and significance. When women feel valued and truly seen, they are more likely to reciprocate these romantic efforts, which usually tends to be the end goal for a man’s wooing.

This is the simple yet effective drive of romantic, love poetry. To woo.

By contrast, women struggle to write effective love poetry. For men, love poems are a tool of pursuit. For women, they help process loss or heartbreak rather than romantic inclination. Men usually respond less to romantic overtures and more to appreciation or respect. This does not mean that love poems are inadequate when written by women. Rather, it means they function differently.

Subscribe now

Poetry aims to make the reader feel something familiar, reflecting them back to their own humanity. This is the art of relatability, and it lies at the heart of all artistic expression. Women frequently struggle to achieve this effect in love poetry because the intended recipient is less inclined to receive it as meaningful in the same way.

In an effort to think through this claim, I’ve collected some love poems written by women which span several centuries. Except, these aren’t technically love poems. Love poems hinge on details which identify and elevate the characteristics of the other person. Think “She Walks In Beauty” by Lord Byron. Lines like:

“And all that’s best of dark and bright / Meet in the aspect of her eyes”

“The smiles that win, the tints that glow / But tell of days in goodness spent”

“A mind at peace with all below, / A heart whose love is innocent!”

give tangible, specific details as to why he loves the recipient. This creates emotional intimacy and expresses the emotion of “love” effectively. Additionally, “Love’s Philosophy” by Percy Byssche Shelley argues that the love between himself and the recipient is righteous by default and by refusing it, the girl opposes nature itself. His final claim:

“And the sunlight clasps the earth

And the moonbeams kiss the sea:

What is all this sweet work worth

If thou kiss not me?”

As we will discover in the poems below, female poets focus on how the recipient makes the writer feel rather than the characteristics of the recipient himself. Common themes in “love” poems written by women include rage, heartbreak, trauma, “I-centric” feelings, or an expression of power through physical intimacy instead of intimacy as mutual romantic expression.

This is not to say women cannot write love poetry, just that generally, when they do, it’s not that great. Let’s begin with a modern “love” poet, Rupi Kaur.

Rupi Kaur

Some wince at the description of Kaur as a poet due to her rampant use of free verse and lack of specificity within diction. However, this is not a debate which concerns this essay. Instead, we focus on the substance of the verses. Read two of her poems:

“I need someone

Who knows struggle

As well as I do

Someone

Willing to hold my feet in their lap

On days it is too difficult to stand

The type of person who gives

Exactly what I need

Before I even know I need it

The type of lover who hears me

Even when I do not speak

Is the type of understanding

I demand”

“He placed his hands

On my mind

Before reaching

For my waist

My hips

My lips

He didn’t call me

Beautiful first

He called me

Exquisite”

Here, we read the words of a woman with high standards. She expresses her demands to have a man who knows what she needs before it’s communicated, listens to her even when she doesn’t say anything, and identifies approximately zero flaws in her personality. These poems cannot be categorized as love poems due to their “I–centric” value. The emphasis is placed on the writer instead of the muse.

“How Do I Love Thee” Elizabeth Barrett Browning

“How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of being and ideal grace.
I love thee to the level of every day’s
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for right.
I love thee purely, as they turn from praise.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints. I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.”

Browning makes an excellent attempt towards a love poem, in fact, this is the closest to an accurate love poem! However, it still expresses an “I-centric” view. Verses emphasize how the writer loves, instead of highlighting the charming qualities within the lover. Browning, like Kaur, writes about herself and her own feelings, not her man.

If you would like to continue this investigation, feel free to read some selected poems written by women below. You can see the pattern. None of these are true, actual, romantic, “love” poems.

• “I think I should have loved you presently” By Edna St. Vincent Millay

• “What lips my lips have kissed, and where, and why” By Edna St. Vincent Millay

• I. Love Songs By Mina Loy

• “Love Letter” By Sylvia Plath

• “Mad Girl’s Love Song” By Sylvia Plath

So, if a woman wishes to express her love to her man effectively, how should she do it? Poetry is probably not the most successful approach. However, if poetry is non-negotiable, an ode is often more effective than a direct love confession. This form tends to appeal to men because it emphasizes admiration—something many enjoy hearing frequently. By focusing on a man’s virtues and strengths rather than on the speaker’s emotions alone, the poem becomes a celebration of the recipient’s many accomplishments. Anne Bradstreet offers an excellent example of this approach below.

“To My Dear And Loving Husband” Anne Bradstreet

“If ever two were one, then surely we.
If ever man were loved by wife, then thee;
If ever wife was happy in a man,
Compare with me ye women if you can.
I prize thy love more than whole mines of gold,
Or all the riches that the East doth hold.
My love is such that rivers cannot quench,
Nor ought but love from thee give recompense.
Thy love is such I can no way repay;
The heavens reward thee manifold, I pray.
Then while we live, in love let’s so persever,
That when we live no more we may live ever.”

This has long since been one of my favorite poems. Bradstreet expertly weaves the love she holds for her husband through verses celebrating their love. From his accomplishment in attaining her happiness, to making him the measure of all her personal value, to saying there’s no comparison to their love together, she celebrates that her love in him is complete and inexhaustible. This is a perfect female love poem.

I’ve never been in love, but here’s a broad attempt to write one more (hopefully) effective “love” poem:

Ode To Men By Kimberly Charest

Girls may not be able to write poignant, romantic love poetry, but we sure can write some break-up poetry. Tune in next week.

Leave a comment

One more burden is his many, many names:

Santa Claus, Santa, Saint Nicholas, St. Nicholas, St. Nick, Kris Kringle, Father Christmas, Old Saint Nick, The Night Visitor, The Christmas Man, The Jolly Old Elf, The Big Man, Chris Cringle, the man with the Bag, Papi Noel, The Yuletide Giver, and many more across the nations which recognize him as a prolific Christmas figure.

Each name insinuates a role, a character, a person. Yet, no one person can be all at once. Which begs the question of the century: Who the fudge is Santa? To assist in this investigative piece, we’ve scoured the lyrics of Christmas tunes which lift their voices in wonder and welcome to this strange being we invite into our homes every year. After close examination, I’ve split Santa into categories based on the assertions made in these songs.

And I finally know who he is. For the sake of your family and sanity, you must know as well.

Is Santa Your Lover? —Caylee

Santa is not my lover. Though I would not be opposed (who doesn’t love an older man?) I have never had the pleasure of Santa taking me on dates, buying me flowers, and wooing my feminine affection.

Santa could be your lover, though. And that’s the point.

Several women over the past few decades see Santa as their lover. He is their companion, their baby, and their dreammaker with innuendos galore. Among these women include Eartha Kitt and Kelly Clarkson.

Miss Eartha Kitt sings the Christmas classic, Santa Baby, dating all the way back to 1953. For over seventy years now, we have heard her call him “baby”. And because we are all adults here, we can trust she is not comparing Santa to the Season’s six pound nine ounce baby Jesus. Baby, when crooned by Miss Kitt, is a romantic term. Which is further backed by her calling him “honey” and “cutie” later in the song.

In her smash hit at a Kohls near you Kelly Clarkson says she will be “waiting” for Santa to visit her. Eagerly, in “4 Carats”, Clarkson has left her door “unlocked”. Not only that, she has copiously familiarized herself with Santa. He knows that “red has always looked good” on her. Contextually, Santa is her man. Yum.

In “Please Santa Please” by Pentatonix, “I’m begging you please, Santa, please make my dreams underneath the tree come true.” This implies a distinctly romantic affair. Why else would she be waiting for him? What dreams are about to be made underneath the tree? What delectable present awaits her?

And who can blame these women for wanting a man like that? Santa’s real estate is hefty (the entire North Pole!). He’s jovial, generous to all the human race, has a stable career, and also wields a great sense of justice by rewarding the nice and despising the naughty. Most importantly, though, he has a beard (hello testosterone).

To clarify, Santa is not a sugar daddy. Though he is expected in both songs to satisfy his woman’s desire for checks, convertibles, and yellow canaries, he does not stop there. He does not brand himself as a commitmentphobe. No, he’s a dedicated gentleman. The women he’s seeing expect rings—engagement rings! That is a lifelong dedication.

So, is Santa a lover? Maybe. He, of course, could be Mrs. Clause’s lover. But forget that pagan harlot and imagine yourself as his lover. Imagine coming home to his jolly smile, warm fireplace, and delicious Christmas cookies. What if you, dear reader, are the future Mrs. Santa Clause?

Ask yourself the following questions: Is your boyfriend older? Does he own a lot of land up north? Does he love cookies? Is he generous but also fat?

Then maybe Santa is your lover.

For the purpose of this article, though, and statistically assuming that your boyfriend does not meet all of the Santa criteria, we must ask this next question:

Is Santa A god? — Kimberly

What is there better to do at Christmas than become desperate? Over whatever exactly is your prerogative. Maybe you’re single. Maybe your wife no longer finds you attractive. Maybe you became overwhelmed at the closing of your local Chili’s. Maybe you’re homeless (it’s free to subscribe, so there’s no reason every homeless person shouldn’t be subscribed right now).

Subscribe now

However desperate you are this Christmas season, you aren’t more desperate than Kelly Clarkson as she sings, “Santa, hear my prayer” and wishes for Brett Eldredge to draw her near and do what the lovers do beneath the infamous parasitic weed of Christmas. This is a tense moment in Christmas song history as the languid allure of the season grips the two—compelling them to nothing less than intense, tempestuous smooching. Clarkson calls out to Santa in a moment of desperation as her hot blood boils with desire. Why else would Clarkson beg Santa to hear her prayer if not to think he’s a god?

Additionally, Ariana Grande calls upon Santa in desperation through her liturgy “Santa Tell Me.” Grande wants to know if her boyfriend will be there next year, and if Santa can facilitate them falling in love: “Santa tell me if you’re really there / Don’t make me fall in love again if he won’t be there next year / Santa tell me if he really cares.”

Her messaging and lyricism implies a type of prayer, or plea. This song functions as an utterly distraught cry in a moment of pure desperation that is her only hope of finding love. Without a boyfriend, her life will slowly falter and she will fall into a deep depression of which she would have no choice but to get into a non-demi-curious, semi-binary relationship with her co-star.

Oh wait, that already happened.

And Santa didn’t save her. He didn’t hear her prayers. He didn’t appreciate her liturgical cry for help. Is this because he’s powerless? Considering he can fly around the world in a single night, the answer must be no. But this does prove Santa isn’t a god, because if he were, then he would’ve saved her from the clutches of Cynthia Erevio. Instead, the answer has to be far more sinister.

Is Santa A Psychopath? — Kimberly

We know Santa sees you when you’re sleeping. We know he knows when you’re awake. We know he compulsively keeps tabs of every action you take. We know he deems himself capable of determining whether you are “naughty” or “nice.” And in the hit Christmas song, “Santa Clause Is Coming To Town” we hear a blatant warning: “You better watch out.” Santa is obsessed with you.

Who else obsesses over you? Psychopaths. Think about it. They share similar characteristics, they do all the same things. The only difference is, Santa does this to your children.

He watches your children, then, he judges your children. Your child threw a toy? He knows. Your child gave the mother-in-law a hug? Oh, he saw it. Your child sold all your stocks and trades? He saw it, and he snickered when it happened.

After he’s done watching your children, he opens his excessively long Excel spreadsheet and logs in his official judgement over your child’s actions. Naughty or nice? Only he decides.

Now, as someone who works with children and judges them profusely, that’s my job. Not Santa’s. And my job security is at risk now. This is why I’m telling the parents.

Parents, Santa is doing your job! He’s stolen your parenting rights and hovers them over your head whenever the Christmas season comes around. Why are you letting a strange man commit breaking and entering crimes into your home to deliver his final judgement over your child’s life? Why are you letting him watch your children? And why does the government not have anything to say about it?

I mean, Santa isn’t their parent, is he?

Is Santa Daddy? —Caylee

As the great poet Pedro Pascal once said, “Daddy is a state of mind.” Well then, Santa must be a state of mind too because it’s looking an awful lot like he’s Daddy.

It’s in his name, after all: Father Christmas. And because it cannot be that Santa doesn’t exist and is actually just your parents, we must face the confusion behind this claim: Santa is not fictional but is, in fact, your biological father. And you, reader, are his illegitimate child. So is Santa Clause one half of your DNA? Let’s explore together.

In “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus” by the Jackson 5, clearly, Mommy is having an affair with Santa. It’s in the title! The innocent child (Michael Jackson himself) witnesses his mother’s affair, but because of his innocence, incorrectly assumes it would have been a “laugh” “if daddy had only seen”.

This doesn’t prove that Santa Clause is your father, though, does it?

Let’s think about this critically. Mommy is visited by Santa each and every year around December 25th. Her husband is nowhere in sight—on Christmas no less! We can assume “Daddy” or her husband has a job like the military that pulls him away from his family on the most important night of the year. If he’s gone, who is there to impregnate Mommy except Old Saint Nick himself?

For further proof, Michael Jackson’s birthday is August 29th. And Tito (his older brother) was born October 15th. Both birthdays place Santa Clause at the scene of the crime: the illegitimate father of the Jackson Five.

Do you need further proof? Okay, you cynic. In “Santa Looked a Lot Like Daddy” we continue to unravel Mommy’s complex web of lies and ongoing affair with “The Man with The Bag”.

In the very title itself, a poor innocent child is, once again, trying to reconcile the reality of seeing Santa affectionate to their mother and the absence of their alleged father. The man who has his “arm around mama” looks familiar. He bears a striking resemblance to the singer’s dad. Coincidence? Does Mommy just have a type? Or could it be that the singer recognizes a piece of themselves in the man whose belly is like a bowl full of jelly?

Mommy has been busted. She has been carrying on an affair with Santa Clause, December 25th after December 25th, while Daddy is gone. She has a type, and whether to cover her tracks or not, this romantic type allows her to pass Santa’s children off as her husband’s.

But I asked if Santa was your daddy, didn’t I? The answer is, of course, yes. Because women cannot be trusted. Especially around temptations as strong as Father Christmas. To reference all of Santa’s sexually magnetic traits, go re-read the “Is Santa A Lover” section of this article. No woman, including your mother, can resist him. So I have a very strong feeling that many of us are running around as half-natives of the North Pole unbeknownst to our poor absent fathers.

Until we get DNA tests proving that, though, no, Santa is not your daddy.

Is Santa A Saint?— Kimberly

As you can tell, both authors of this essay love historical accuracy. It’s in light of this, that when we first asked the question, “Who the fudge is Santa?” we knew our astute investigative journalism would eventually compel us to scour the greatest historical documents tracing his name back millennia—to the very beginning of his existence.

So, we asked ChatGPT and this is what it said:

Santa Claus is rooted in the historical figure Saint Nicholas of Myra, a Greek Christian bishop born around March 15, 270 CE in Patara (in modern-day Turkey). Nicholas became famous for his generosity, secret gift-giving, and defense of the poor, traits that later evolved into the modern image of Santa. He was also known for his fierce commitment to Christian doctrine; according to long-standing tradition, at the Council of Nicaea in 325 CE he became so angered by the theologian Arius’s teachings that he slapped him across the face. He died on December 6, 343 CE, a date still celebrated as his feast day.

I don’t know much about saints, but I do know you don’t normally reach sainthood after slapping a holy man across the face. However, I do know that one prerequisite for being a Saint is that you have to be dead.

So, it seems we’ve at last arrived at the conclusion of our essay: Santa is a Saint, and therefore Santa is dead.

The Great Discovery

We wrote this essay for the children. So that when your kids, or the kids you babysit ask you this year, “Who is Santa?” You can look them fully in the face and say with the highest confidence and conviction, “My dear, Santa is dead.” Yes, Santa is dead and belief in his existence today is a lie perpetuated by people who have nothing else in their lives to believe in.

But there’s hope.

Santa may be dead, but Jesus isn’t and the Holy Spirit is far more powerful than Rudoph’s nose or the “Christmas magic” which helps Santa slip down your chimney.

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”

Isaiah 9:6 ESV

Every day we wake up thinking: What kind of woman should I become?

To answer this question, I ventured where most young women seek life’s most critical answers, TikTok.

Scrolling through female-centered content online I discovered videos which can be categorized into two main perspectives: corporate girl core and trad wife influencer. Corporate girl content features office outfits, client meetings, and useful tips for surviving a male-dominated field. Women in this category encourage young girls to live to a standard set for men. Trad wife content features stay-at-home moms or wives filming themselves in a milkmaid dress picking homegrown vegetables, cooking meals from scratch, and posting useful tips for raising toddlers. These videos, posted from the perfect angle with structured lighting, showcases much effort in content creation. What’s more, these two lifestyles war with each other online. The cultural norm and anti-norm debates grow rapidly divisive, schismatic, and condescending towards one another.

When twenty-two year old recent college grads consume this content consistently, they grow confused and polarized as to which lifestyle actually serves women. For us, this isn’t a little TikTok debate or point of interest on a talk show. This is our actual life and we think about it constantly.

My friend and I desire to be devoted wives and good mothers. We want a strong, stable, family unit, but what do we do when Prince Charming takes his time or we appreciate the young professionals we are becoming? This causes us to question our purposes, and wonder how we can have both, if we can have both at all.

Everyone tells us we have nothing to worry about, that life carries its peculiar ways of figuring it out for us. Yet, the yearning to be married and be mothers doesn’t cease. The pressure to make something of our lives, build a professional portfolio, and use all our potential before we turn thirty races through our mind every second of the day.

What’s a girl to do? Become a self-sufficient, powerful girl boss or lock herself in a tower waiting for Prince Charming to rescue her from the snares of corporate America?

If TikTok or internet personalities won’t help me answer these questions, maybe speaking to real women whom I admire in my life will. For me, these women are my mom and my boss.

My mom was a stay-at-home mom and wife for nearly twenty years. She dedicated her life to God, her children, and her husband. She dropped out of a pre-med degree to marry my father and hasn’t worked on her professional career since. In a world of girl bosses and career-chasers, my mom lived the trad wife lifestyle before Pinterest made it trendy. She diligently homeschooled my sister and me, took pride in a clean, peaceful house, and literally ground the grain used in her homemade bread. Thanks to Mom, I am willing, prepared, and excited to be a wife and mother. I’m not afraid of the stay-at-home life and value it deeply.

However, I also understand it's not at all what’s posted on the internet. It’s not a perfectly positioned camera with ideal lighting, a spotless house, and matching outfits for your kids. It’s difficult. It’s messy. It’s a constant cycle of self-sacrifice. It’s the hardest thing a woman can do. There were moments of pure, ignited frustration between both of us, especially during the teenage years. It’s hard. It tests the limits of your capacity to be kind, understanding, loving, and compassionate. Not every woman can do it, I think.

My boss, on the other hand, has done both. In the early years of her career, she joined the military and rose to the rank of captain in the Air Force, serving as military police at both the Pentagon and Andrews Air Force Base. While enlisted, she completed two tours in Operation Enduring Freedom, one to an undisclosed location, and continued her service as an officer following the 9/11 attacks. Following 10 years of service, she gave it all up to become a stay-at-home mom soon after having her children. However, after several years serving her family, she jumped back into work while her kids were teenagers to lead a ministry nonprofit dedicated to the personal and professional development of girls and young ladies. I see firsthand the way she pushes herself to be the leader her team needs. I watch her calm, compassionate response to crises, and the efficient yet edifying contribution she makes towards every person she encounters. She is the epitome of soft spoken, diligent, feminine, leadership. Not every woman can be her, I think.

When I think about these women, I don’t think about what they do. I think about who they are and how they’ve adapted to these different roles in their life. I think about how they’re gracefully resilient through all obstacles.

I think about how they’ve grown into the woman I admire.

The point being, a woman’s role in life changes over time. It’s supposed to. That’s the beauty of being a woman. We are adaptable to the needs of our families, our goals, and the seasons of life we live.

I’ll end with the conclusion my friend and I came to on our phone call, “In most of life, if you want to make something happen, you can do it. Want to lose weight? Count your calories. Don’t like how pale you are? Self-tan. Want to move somewhere? Go! Start a new life. But there’s nothing you can do to make your husband appear. That’s why nothing anyone ever says about it makes you feel better. I don’t want to look back at the years of my life without a husband saying I was ‘just waiting’ when I could’ve been doing something really worthwhile or cool.”

I am beyond excited to meet my husband whenever it’s time for him to arrive. I’m also applying to law schools, writing constantly, learning the electric guitar, enrolling in Toastmasters, and pursuing every aspect of my interests because I’m out here creating the most epic mom-lore for my future kids. I may be waiting for Prince Charming but life isn’t. So, I’m going to live it. I’m going to see what I’m capable of. I’m testing my limits. I want an adventure. I want the obstacles. I want the mom-lore.

I am only ever supposed to be the woman I am becoming, and she’s going to change throughout her life. She’s going to change with work, in careers, in talents, as a bride, in motherhood, and in old age. And, I just can’t wait to meet her either.

I found this poem in the way all great art is discovered: late night doomscrolling. Unfortunately, I am but a consumerist receptacle blinded by the blue, candescent screen held centimeters from rapidly shrinking pupils. As the crick in my neck shouted at my brain, pleading for an inkling of self-discipline to save me from this mindless rectangle of hell, it appeared.

I digress.

This category of human is one for the history books. Whether this is a good or bad thing is yet to be seen. I carry no preference. To be clear, I am not shaming poets for using Instagram to show their art (I do this), I am stating poets who create out of a selfish or debased desire aren’t getting the point of creating. Art is reflective of the divine, the eternal, the natural, and the human. Poetry explains how they all interact with each other. Insular, overly-emotional, vulgar, and self-oriented poetry is not reflective of the true purpose in creating.

Respect the purpose of art and I’ll respect your art, essentially.

Warning: Uncomfortable Sexual Innuendo

mainamind

A post shared by @mainamind

For those unable to click on the link, I have the words typed below. Although, you can’t really comprehend this fully unless you watch the video. The poet’s confidence and facial expressions truly make this a surreal experience.

I want to exist in a moment where we both know we are about to make love. That moment where we’re both half-drunk. Where time slows down with every word that you speak. Where crossing our legs underneath the dinner table feels legendary. Where the goosebumps on your skin rise up to the warmth of my lips. I want to exist in a moment where staring into your eyes makes my heartbeat sound like your name. Where your thoughts slow grind to mine until our energies combine, where you legs make way for my hands to caress your thighs, gently. Where your voice betrays the composure in your eyes, where your thoughts betray the innocence in your smile. I want to exist in a moment where your legs are in the sky— before I make you rain. So, if that’s okay with you, I’ll see you tonight.

Poem by @mainamind

This isn’t okay with me. Namely for the lack of depth in his words, but I’ll break this down in a second. First, I need to explain something to men.

In case you didn’t already know, this isn’t how you get a woman to sleep with you! Actually, this isn’t how you’re supposed to speak to a woman, ever. Even if you’re married and technically can do this stuff, please don’t read this to you wife as foreplay. And even if you’re not the marrying kind of man (you should be though) this isn’t the kind of thing you post on the internet if you want women to sleep with you.

For examples on what to read to make a woman sleep with you, read Bryon or this article on my top five romantic poem recommendations.

Why doesn’t this make a woman swoon?

I will not pretend to be an expert on men—nor do I think I want to be— but a running theory might be because men aren’t speaking to women in real life. Why? The internet holds the capability to bring every fantasy to life. Satisfying a man’s mind has never been easier. As such, this poet fantasizes that his words hold the capacity to seduce women. This is further emphasized in his delivery. The facial expressions, slow progression of speech, and salacious eye movement clearly convey his desire to romance a woman with his words.

But, it doesn’t work.

He would know this if he actually spoke to a woman in real life. Additionally, his words focus on what he wants from this interaction. The result is an over-sexual, cringe-worthy experience revealing this poem is actually a poorly expressed, debased, fantasy resulting from little to no successful interaction with women.

How do I know it’s his fantasy and not based on any real life conversations? I’m a woman. Trust me.

I know this seems cruel to state. Talking to attractive women is hard for most men, but it’s supposed to be. The point of romancing women is to learn how to do it well. You won’t be successful in this until you fail a couple times. The point I’m trying to make is that its far better to experience rejection in-person and learn from it than it is to make up fake scenarios in your head (or procure them on the internet).

You’re not supposed to be satisfied easily. Anything worth having will be hard to attain. Especially with women.

Main takeaway: Trying to relate to women on a pornographic level is not how women prefer to be spoken to.

Vieth on Vulgarity

Aside from the lack of structure and essence of poetry in the video above, there is an additional reason this art should remain unappealing. Gene Edward Veith Jr., author of Reading Between the Lines, makes an argument against sexual art claiming it not only violates aesthetic integrity but is also cheap. “Stimulating an audience artistically takes skill and craft; stimulating them sexually is far easier,” and, “Insensitivity to aesthetic decorum is perhaps one of the worst weaknesses in contemporary literature” (Veith 36). I’ve spoken to several people who won’t comprehend poetry as an art form. The simple reply is, “I don’t understand it.” This harkens back to a failed education system but it’s also a symptom of a greater issue: modern poetry lacks the aesthetic needed to retain attention.

In part, this is due to increased vulgarity and decreased value of the sacred. What constitutes as “vulgar” is a broad spectrum of activities. Such a spectrum would need a second essay to uncover, but the Bible is clear on the Christian’s responsibility to love people, which includes not taking advantage of them mentally, emotionally, or through a screen—something considered as vulgar.

This poem might be the epitome of modern, secular poetry. Not only does the author fantasize over his desires in such a way to make it vulgar and cheap, he sells himself in the process. His own creativity and understanding of the Imago Dei is taken and sold for clicks, likes, views, and comments. He takes advantage of the gift in creating, casting pearls before swine.

For these reasons, this poem is placed in the “commercialized” row in our little chart here:

I promise there’s good art I’ve noticed, too. More to come on that note soon.

Share

There’s no intro paragraph to this week’s essay. I just can’t find the word to prepare you for the video below. Just watch it and then come back to me for explanation.

enron

A post shared by @enron

In solidarity with A.I., I CHATGPT’d synonyms for the feelings I had while watching this. Here are its results:

1. Strange

2. Bizarre

3. Odd

4. Peculiar

5. Unconventional

6. Abnormal

7. Quirky

8. Unnatural

9. Outlandish

10. Freaky

I’m not entirely sure which one fits this best but for me personally, I would bet some serious cash on bizarre or abnormal.

Subscribe now

To analyze this art we must further define the term intention, because its clear from the video the artist had an intention— to dance— but it remains unclear as to why or to what end this is reached. I am not formally trained in dance, so I am not the best person to analyze his dancing. Although, if it’s supposed to be interpretative, and if I had to base my analyzation off his dance alone, I don’t think I could deduce his argument very well.

Lucky for us he has a second intention, to tell a story. I may not be the best person to ask about dancing, but I sure can analyze the heck out of a story.

The Narrative

This dance essentially personifies the alleged feelings of a paintbrush as it confronts the big, bad meanie-pants that is Artificial Intelligence. The paintbrush dances out its emotional state as it processes its previous sanctity. It spirals into a breakdown once it understands it will “be dragged through the course sands of time” to contend with A.I. art.

The dance ends as the artists loudly declares, “The world requires you!” then attacks the “A.I.” in an effort to destroy it.

Side note: The “A.I” in this room is actually a huge chunk of ice. As the artist pounces, intending to fight A.I., it shatters into several pieces. I think this is funny and we should all laugh at it.

If you’ve followed this series for any amount of time, you understand how our categorizing system works. Currently, we have four tiers of art:

For more information on these tiers and how we rank them visit this link.

What I Like:

• The narrative and idea

• The funny ice smashing

What I Don’t Like:

• The insufferable, pretentious attitude of the artist

• The presumptuous over-intellectualist vibe of the video

• The ultimate un-relatability of the art itself

For this reasoning, the above art is placed in the “over-intellectualized and/or over-emotional art” category on our trusty, little chart.

Reasoning

I agree with the narrative of the dance, to a certain degree. I’ll delve into this more in the next section of this article but for now, I agree with the narrative this artist tells.

Art and A.I. art are at odds with each other. There is a battle between human artists and the fear surrounding the artistic capabilities of A.I. Humans have long expressed their desires, lifestyles, imaginations, and talent through art. It’s a mainstream recognition of our innate humanity. All of these things this artist represents well.

However, I don’t think this interpretive dance is “good” art because the medium of the art is ultimately un-relatable. As stated previously, I cannot analyze the dancing effectively enough, but simply watching it made me raise my eyebrows in concern. Also, the vibes in the room are giving elitism and that’s just not something I’m ever going to get behind.

For these reasons, this week’s art is placed in our chart’s bottom tier.

Cessation

Let’s go back to the thesis of Softly, She Speaks: We must create with the same intention and purpose God used when He created the world, when He created you.

Let’s be honest: A.I. art is not art. It’s science. It’s a bunch of little codes piecing together its understanding of the words you typed into its prompt mainframe. It’s not a divine work completed out of necessity to create something beautiful or emulative of human experience. It didn’t come from the depths of the human soul or from eternity which God has placed in human hearts. It will never—truly—be art.

But, it easily can be categorized as it. Which, is why I am calling for a complete re-definition of art. There must be a difference between the real and the copy. The only true definition of art is the Christian one based in the understanding of the Imago Dei, which is where I take the definition of art from above. If art is a person creating with the same intention and purpose God used when He created the world, when He created you, then obviously A.I. can never be art. Therefore, it must remain science.

Moving forward, I will now most determinedly refer to A.I. “art” as science and encourage others to do so as well.

And, as always, if there’s a flaw in this logic, please let me know in the comments.

@americanidol@sophie powers’ bold “STFU” audition shocks judges – standing O or offensive? 😱 #americanidol

Tiktok failed to load.

Enable 3rd party cookies or use another browser

What I Like:

• Her spunky little attitude

• Her confidence and straight-faced performance

• The complete honesty of the lyrics

• The fact it’s just dripping with Gen-Z internet humor

What I Don’t Like:

• Literally everything else

I can’t lie, her performance is peak. The straight face, the outfit, the comedic timing, the sass, the spunk, it’s admirable and I respect it.

However, it’s not good art. It’s enjoyable, humorous, and entertaining, but it doesn’t evoke truth or reflect upon our humanity and relationship to the world in a deeper, thoughtful way. For these reasons, it shall be placed in the top tier of our trusty, little chart.

For those who are new here, the ranking of the chart and set-up of this series can be found in this article.

TO BE CLEAR, this is art. It’s just not good art. Please read the above article for further explanation on this before you shoot me a private message. <3

Why This Might Just Actually Be A Marketing Scheme

The reason this could be a marketing tactic is that her social media is actively pumping out her new music releases and this song is not included in those. It’s also not available for public listening—she has teased at releasing it sense the recent 10 million views of her audition—which might’ve been the entire point of auditioning.

Power’s released music shares the same early 2000’s angsty-teen-pop vibe that her audition’s original song illustrates, but not to the same degree. Her audition is far more subdued than the released music.

Cessation

In the interest of sharing truth in love, I believe the like-ability of this genre of music varies person to person. (As is the case with most art). This is simply the act of developing a personal taste in art.

For example, I do not like her songs. But, this does not mean that my personal opinion should hold any value when assessing the level of truth her art displays. While an argument could be made to say this art reflects the truth of humanity in the sense people react to life in such a way their hearts become incredibly hardened, likening to the spirit and diction of her lyrics, I rebut that argument.

The Christian view of her song begins with the understanding our hearts should dwell on, “Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things” (Phil. 4:8). While there’s truth in her lyrics in the sense our hearts can harden to the point of anger, malice, profanity, vulgarity, or indifference, God did not create us to experience life this way. His heart mourns when ours seek deceit and listen to the lies carefully whispered to us, slowly becoming the cause of hardened hearts.

The simple fact is, the truth of humanity is not what we are on earth, but who God has created us to be in Him. The person He washes clean, restores, makes new, and grants new mercies to each morning is the humanity we (Christians) should seek to reflect in art. This does not mean art has to be overtly-Christian, just that we should call out glorifying hardened hearts when necessary.

Remember to send your submissions when you see a piece of art worthy of critique (good ones as well!).

Leave a comment

This series has me thinking I must write a few foundation essays on what “good” art is, how we develop personal tastes in art, and how Christians should see to value art…

BUT. I have an idea. And honestly, I’ve been wanting to do this for a long time, so I’m actually excited life’s cruel talons entrapped me enough to finally announce this passion project. However, I did complete the first draft of a short story this week so that’s exciting!

This series is called Bad Art, Modernity, & Me in which I take a piece of modern art ranging from TikToks to prestigious museum galleries and discuss what I like or don’t like about it. Here’s the point of this series:

No one denies modern art in America sucks. But, rarely are people able to articulate why. If I firmly believe art holds the capacity to shift cultures, change minds, and open hearts (which I do), then encouraging good art to be created is essential to the well-being of our culture.

Why is it necessary to point out the reasons why specific art is bad, won’t that hurt people’s feelings?

I am not in the business of hurting people’s feelings, but I am in the business of sharing truth. If this cause— changing art in America— is something I’m passionate about then someone needs to share the truth.

I don’t want to come off as mean-spirited, and I will take careful steps to share the truth in love, the last thing I would ever want is to discourage a person from continuing to create beauty, but I do firmly believe good art has the power to inspire others to better life, show the beauty of this world, and—most importantly— be emblematic of our inherent Imago Dei. God wants His children to utilize our Imago Dei and I don’t want to make a person feel like they shouldn’t exercise this.

Leave a comment

Art is Subjective

I firmly detest the idea that good art is subjective. Art in itself is subjective, but good art is good art for a reason and therefore it cannot be subjective. For the purposes of this series I will illustrate this point via tiers:

This is all part of a greater purpose called curating your own taste in art which I shall discuss in greater detail at a later date.

Without further adieu, here’s an artist that came across my FYP this morning from @melina.kb on Instagram:

melina.kb

A post shared by @melina.kb

What I like:

• No doubt she has talent for singing! The vocal control on some verses is admirable.

• Visuals in the lyrics really pop-off. Here a few of my favorites: “crying at my coffee-shop,” “filled with Plan-B, books, and mace,” “wipe you record clean.”

• The rawness in her voice.

What I don’t like:

• The lack of truth and in the lyrics.

• The sensationalized dramaticism

• Lady Justice? What in the DC comic…

• The rhyme scheme is a bit off (just a tad though)

What Makes This Objectively Bad

Ultimately, what makes this objectively bad is the lack of truth in the lyrics and the overly-emotional presentation of the song. This isn’t to say emotions are bad. All art should elicit some type of emotion, or at least, deep appreciation in some way, but presentations which become overly-emotional takes away from the talent and drowns out the truth aspect of the art (if there is a truth aspect to be found).

Again, I respect her right to feel this way, I appreciate her talent and the rawness in her voice, but it’s too much and makes me question if she’s being authentic in her actions.

For the reasons above, this video will be placed in the bottom tier: overly-intellectualized/emotional art.

Again, this series is only here on the weeks I cannot complete a full piece of writing by Friday afternoon, but I hope it’s just as meaningful and fun.

I also want to open this series up to you!

If you see a piece of modern art that is objectively bad, send it in! I already take submissions for essays on my Instagram (@softly.shespeaks), I’ll take your suggestions for this series there of via direct message on Substack.

The next couple essays on here are actually suggested from Instagram! Here they are:

1. Why is everyone on social media saying 23 is the worst year of a woman’s life? (Why Christian circles need to stop idealizing marriage).

2. Commercialization of literature (is the publishing industry selling out good stories for a quick buck?) (The answer is yes btw. They are a business money is priority #1).

3. I Just Read Fiction For Fun For the First Time in Five Years: Here’s What I Learned

4. First Poem Published in a Publication!!! (I’ll share on here too once it comes out!).

Do you agree with the placement of her song on the tier? Do you think this will be a fun series? Let me know in the comments!

There is much banter regarding the return to social norms in American culture, with many conservatives discussing the best way to begin. (How to turn the culture around, not how to make a baby). This seemingly complicated issue actually holds a profoundly simple solution: love women, honor the men, and protect the children.

President Trump’s address to Congress did just that.

Loving the Women

The majority of guests President Trump mentioned were women—mothers, widows, daughters, girls—even by acknowledging the men and young men Trump payed homage to the sanctity of traditional family virtues which itself loves women.

In case you missed it, here are the names of all twelve women Trump recognized.

Helen, Allyson, and Kaylee are the widow and daughters of Corey Comperatore, who was killed by the same gunman who shot President Trump in Pennsylvania during his campaign in 2024.

Allyson and Lauren Phillips are the mother and sister of Laken Riley, the female college student who was viciously murdered by an illegal immigrant.

Alexis Nungaray is the mother of Jocelyn Nungaray, a 12-year-old girl who was also brutally murdered by two illegal immigrants.

Elliston Berry—a 15-year-old—was the victim of deepfake videos created by someone in her school with malicious intent.

Stephanie Diller is the widow of Jonathan Diller, an NYPD officer murdered at a traffic stop by a repeat criminal.

Haley Ferguson, former foster child, is completing her senior year at Middle Tennessee State University and a Fostering the Future scholarship recipient.

January Littlejohn, a mother and parent’s rights advocate who sued her daughter’s school board after the middle school socially transitioned her daughter into a different sexual identity without her parent’s consent.

Payton McNabb who played against a biological man during a September 2022 volleyball match in high school. During this match she was significantly injured when a volleyball, spiked by the man, hit her face.

As an honorable mention, Malphine Fogel, the mother of Mac Fogel, who Trump honored as fighting for her son’s freedom from the Russian government as he was wrongfully sentenced to 14 years in a Russian prison.

Picture Creds: https://www.usatoday.com/picture-gallery/news/politics/2025/03/04/president-trump-congress-address/81159483007/

Loving Women Because They Are Women

As a young woman—who has grown up under the left’s influence—Trump’s address solidified a suspicion I’ve held recently that conservatism is the true pro-woman party.

This makes sense considering most of the policies and cultural preferences submitted by the left center around dehumanizing women or reducing them to surface-type feeble, dum-dums:

Their trans agenda mocked our inherent, beautiful femininity; the abortion agenda told women they shouldn’t be anything other than a slave to the corporate system and engaging in a respectful, loving partnership with a man to experience the sacrificial love of motherhood is evil; the feminist agenda told women they couldn’t learn to ask for a raise; and the sexual revolution humiliated women by admonishing their self-respect.

The left is fundamentally anti-woman. All of their policies and preferences are aimed at stealing our essence.

But in Trump’s address, women were recognized not only for the hardships and tragedies walked through, but for their place in society as women.

The young women in sports are loved not because they were in sports but because they were girls in sports. The widows and mothers are loved because they are the widows and mothers of American citizens. The connection to their family and society, as well as the hardships endured, is what America acknowledged within them.

Going back to my first point, in order to return to classical values in our culture we must first love the women, honor the men, and protect children. Trump honored the men in service to our nation with the guests he brought and protected the children in accepting Peyton to West Point and making DJ an honorary Secret Service agent, marking a return to traditional conservative values.

Cessation

Before watching this address, a friend and I were discussing whether America really is the greatest nation in the history of the world. For context, I am GenZ. The ideology predominating our country and culture for the past eight or so years is all I’ve ever known. The talk about “America so being back” or us entering a “Golden Age” was not something I completely agreed with. I wasn’t against it, but I wasn’t so sure of it either.

I’ve never lived a life apart from the liberally motivated headlines and culture Christians and conservatives have fought against in recent years. This “Restored America” people are referencing scares me a little bit, but only because it’s unknown.

President Trump’s congressional address placed all those worries to rest. I’ve never been more proud to be an American than when he finished speaking: not just as an American, but as a young woman.

Leave a comment

Don’t worry men I’ve written plenty about how you should be honored:

Then again, the job market has always been rough for creative individuals.

Either way, in an effort to combat the stain of a “barista degree” here are some of my top 7 trusted, tried, and proven ways to respond to family members making fun of your passion project this year.

But first, a disclaimer:

It becomes necessary, when combating negativity, to respond in the same way Paul reminds us in Romans 2:4, “that God's kindness is meant to lead you to repentance” (ESV). No sane, smart individual becomes a liberal arts major with the intent to secure a stable career (outside of teaching and academia). Now, I am sure there are insane, un-smart individuals who do pursue a liberal arts degree with the intent to maintain a career; we can pray for those individuals.

It is difficult to maintain a creative career, if not entirely impossible, but it can be done.

So, as members of the liberal arts community, let your family in on this joke. Let them know you are in this degree for the cultural enrichment and enjoyment, not primarily for the financial aspects.

So, here you go. Your top 7 ways to respond to people who make fun of your liberal arts degree:

1) “Do You Want to Be A Teacher?” (Only applies to people who do not want to be teachers)

This is a great time to bring out the big guns and show all the special things you do or study with your education. Examples below:

“I am not interested in being a teacher, but I have (drawn/painted/written etc.) this!”

Show them your masterpiece.

Then look them straight in the face, “What have you done that is this cool?”

2) “Hope You Know How To Make A Latte”

I actually love this comment because there are so many ways to respond. Here are a few of my favorites:

Option One: Everyone should know how to make a great latte! This is just basic life skills in this day and age.

Option Two: Yes! But if I ever see you through a drive though window I won’t be making yours for you.

Option Three: Most of the lattes you drink on the way to your job are made by liberal arts men and women. Sometimes this is the highlight of your day. Exercise gratitude.

3) "I See, You’re In College For The Good Ole’ Mrs. Degree…” (Only applies to women).

Sadly, this did not happen to me. But, I definitely would have dropped out to be a cutsey little submissive housewife if I had gotten so lucky.

4) "Back In My Day If Your Hands Weren’t Callused and Dirty For Dinner You Weren’t A Real Man” (Only applies to men).

Honestly, slay. Men should work.

Also, did you know Michelangelo's David required one of the hardest, toughest pairs of hands to carve that stone?

5) “What Have You Done With That?”

Option One: “Um, not much at this point. But I have big plans!” Then show them the cool things you do.

Option Two: “Yep! I have had X published, Y displayed in an art museum, Z promoted on this media channel etc…”

6) “You Know That’s Useless, Right?”

Your mom is useless.

7) “Great, Another Liberal”

To be honest, I get it. Conservatives should be more interested in art than they are. That’s why I started this Substack.

Thanks for reading!

As this season comes to a close I want to share a little secret with you:

I went to three colleges to receive an English degree.

Yeah, THREE. But not just three colleges… three different TYPES of colleges.

I began this academic career at a community college, transferred to a public institution, and ended at an online, private university (my dream college).

None of this was planned, but every bit of it was directed by the Lord.

When I began higher education, I swore I would never become a Liberal Arts major and most certainly not an English major.

Think of it! Writing essays all day? Absolutely not! A waste of tuition and time. (At that time in my life I had zero interest or care for the humanities and the truth which is uncovered by studying them).

Oh come and see what God has done, though!

Now, I get to write essays about the Lord’s gift of creating through the arts for the rest of my life! 17 year old Kimberly would be so disappointed.

I have been waiting to share this story of the Lord’s great kindness and as a Christmas present I am letting you know about these upcoming weeks.

Along with the usually scheduled essays on art, original poetry, and discussions on Christian creativity, I want to share with you some of most impactful ways Jesus has moved and changed my heart from absolute disdain towards the arts to an intense advocate for His wonderful gift of creating.

This is such an incredible story and I cannot wait to share it with you.

Get excited for some big things coming your way! See scheduled articles/essays below:

• Why the world needs the Liberal Arts
  

• The differences between all three colleges (campus life, education, professors, political vibes, study labor, etc..)
  

• How the liberal arts education changes from each institution
  

• How to make a liberal arts degree work for you
  

• Conversations from classes
  

• How to navigate through the Liberal Arts community as a conservative (and a Christian)

• How God has used an unlikely college career to glorify and redeem brokenness

• Anything else I can remember

Life is an interesting ride, but Jesus makes it an adventure. This season was the biggest adventure yet.

Here is to whatever He asks me to do next!

Subscribe now

Remember to subscribe and share to stay up to date.

Much internet debate circles around these two individuals regarding the strange, almost anti-human behavior they display in these interviews. One such example would be Erivo’s response of alleged sincerity upon hearing the news, “People are taking the lyrics of “Defying Gravity” and really holding space with that.”

See below:

@etalkctvThe reporter behind the viral "holding space" "Defying Gravity" interview, Tracy Gilchrist, has finally broken her silence. She spoke with Variety and cleared up a few misconceptions surrounding the viral "Wicked' press moment. #Wicked #HoldingSpace #ArianaGrande #CynthiaErivo #TracyGilchrist #Explainer #Interview

Tiktok failed to load.

Enable 3rd party cookies or use another browser

The context of this interview revolves around “queer media” and being present within all major senses (physical, emotional, mental) as people listen to Erivo sing in the musical. There are countless examples of their odd interactions and quirks, but the goal of this essay is not to critique anyone’s intentions, so I will not be sharing any more videos of the stars.

The goal of this essay is to critique the culture’s response to these intentions. Specifically, the response within the art world or humanities. (Sadly, yes, this includes theater).

Most of the American culture’s response has been to create memes, parodies, or silly videos with the audio from the interview. These are quite enjoyable. You should watch a couple if you need a laugh. However, the world of art- acting, writing, singing, composing music, painting, and theater- seems to contain a separate worldview entirely.

Support for these actresses began with actor Auli'i Cravalho, the voice of Moana. She responds to the internet’s response towards Ariana Grande’s and Cynthia Erivo’s emotionality stating, “I need people to understand what it’s like to be a theater kid. Being a theater kid is emotional. Get off my girls Ariana and Cynthia’s backs. Do you understand me?” (Coman par. 3)

To Cravalho’s point, I get it. People should take pride in hard work and there is no denying these two stars in question worked hard; (Presumably, I haven’t seen the film yet).

In short, there is no reason why these two stars should be acting this way. Satisfaction of a job well done is universally felt, well and often.

The above message may sound a bit harsh, and if it did, I want the reader to know that this is because there is a difference between cultural emotionalism and biblical emotionalism.

Cultural Emotionalism

We live in an emotional culture. And, while a healthy dose of properly regulated emotion is good, our American culture is fueled by deregulated emotions. When this happens, people become disengaged from reality. This is what critics are noticing with Ariana and Cynthia. The emotions expressed on the press tour are deregulated, disengaged, and, to a degree, elitist.

This can largely be applied to the greater American culture as a whole. This tone of deregulated emotion has ruled the nation’s online community and local policies for a while. With any luck, though, these next four years will usher in a change for deregulated culture.

When/if this change occurs, it could take two different directions: the culture could be dominated by logic without any thought towards a healthy, regulated emotional state, or, (with much prayer) a revival and restoration of biblical emotionalism could take root.

Biblical Emotionalism

Our God is a great and awesome engineer. Our God is a great and awesome artist. Our God is both logical and creative. So, when He endowed humans with the gift of being made in the Imago Dei (Image of God) He gave us these qualities as well. This is best illustrated in the design of the human brain: one side deals with logic and the other with creativity, respectively. God gave humans equal amounts of the ability to reason and feel deeply through the Imago Dei.

As such, He knows it is best for us to use these gifts in accordance with His design and structure. Emotions are an expression of the beauty of the design of our Creator. But, they cannot be properly expressed unless the logic of why a person feels deeply is implemented. Yet again, this is best seen in the design of the human brain. An article by NPR published in 2013 states, “It takes two hemispheres to be logical – or to be creative” (Lombrozo par. 9). In essence, both parts of the brain are needed to conclude a logical fact and create something truly beautiful.

Hence, operating out of pure emotion opposes God’s design for expressing truthful emotions. Deregulated emotions do not act within His design for processing emotions properly.

Cessation

Ariana Grande and Cynthia Erivo’s emotionalism in these press tours are merely a result of the culture’s response to deregulated emotions.

Christians, God does not call us to judge or be unkind to these stars, we understand that only God’s kindness can lead people to repentance (Romans 2:4). But He does call us to speak truth to the evil of the world (Ephesians 4:15). And, if the actions of Ariana Grande and Cynthia Erivo do not align with biblical expectations for emotions, then we must kindly help them understand why.

To Auli'i Cravalho’s point: no, theater kids are not special. And making it seem like they are experiencing something special or “other” will not help to bring the culture back to a grounding point. Or limit the incredible memes.

To conclude, everyone has worked hard at something in their life, but most people will not reach out and caress someone’s long, fake nail over it.

Works Cited

Coman, Monica. “‘Get off [Their] Backs’: Moana Voice Actor Shares Support to Wicked’s Ariana Grande and Cynthia Erivo.” CBR, 28 Nov. 2024, www.cbr.com/moana-aulii-cravalho-support-wicked-ariana-grande-cynthia-erivo/.

Lombrozo, Tania. “The Truth about the Left Brain / Right Brain Relationship.” NPR, NPR, 2 Dec. 2013, www.npr.org/sections/13.7/2013/12/02/248089436/the-truth-about-the-left-brain-right-brain-relationship#:~:text=One%20idea%20that’s%20often%20heard,of%20as%20%22logical%22!).

“Make Your Day.” TikTok, ETalk, www.tiktok.com/@etalkctv/video/7441706668834032952?embed_source=121374463%2C121468991%2C121439635%2C121433650%2C121404359%2C121477481%2C121351166%2C121331973%2C120811592%2C120810756%3Bnull%3Bembed_blank&refer=embed&referer_url=cdn.iframe.ly%2Fapi%2Fiframe%3Fmedia%3D1%26app%3D1%26url%3Dhttps%253A%252F%252Fwww.tiktok.com%252F%2540etalkctv%252Fvideo%252F7441706668834032952%26key%3De27c740634285c9ddc20db64f73358dd&referer_video_id=7441706668834032952. Accessed 3 Dec. 2024.

I am not doing that today.

Today, we are rallying men to their purpose and watching women when they swoon as we read the Medieval poet, Richard Lovelace’s poem, “To Lucasta, Going to the Wars.”

This poem acts as a letter in which a knight writes to his lover explaining why he must leave her side to fulfill his promise, duty, and responsibility as a man.

Subscribe now

The poem begins with a compliment; the knight calls his lover pure and honest. He begs her to not think him unkind since he leaves her to wage war. The knight professes this war is akin to chasing after “a new mistress” which he willing embraces with “stronger faith” than he embraced his first lover (Lovelace lines 5-7). He clarifies he leaves her not because his feelings have diminished but because he could not truly love her if he was not willing to first protect her.

He closes this letter stating it would be unchivalrous, disingenuous, and contradictory for him to love her before honor; his love for her must flow out of his ability to honor, protect, and defend her.

“I could not love thee (Dear) so much, / Lov’d I not honour more.” (Lovelace lines 11-12).

Uhm…is it getting hot in here or is that just me?

Read the poem below:

Tell me not (Sweet) I am unkind,
        That from the nunnery
Of thy chaste breast and quiet mind
       To war and arms I fly.

True, a new mistress now I chase,
       The first foe in the field;
And with a stronger faith embrace
       A sword, a horse, a shield.

Yet this inconstancy is such
      As you too shall adore;
I could not love thee (Dear) so much,
      Lov’d I not Honour more.

This poem exemplifies Biblical masculinity since it follows the leadership structure given to men and women in the New Testament of which husbands should submit to their wives just as Christ submits to the church:

“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.” (English Standard Version, Eph. 5: 20 - 28).

This knight is loving his wife (let us go ahead and assume he is writing to his wife) Biblically as he places his responsibility to protect over fear, his own body, and possible death. Just as Jesus died to protect and defend His Bride, the Christian Church, this knight is willing to protect and defend his love. Moreover, this knight understands this is his role in society and readily expresses his desire to fulfill it.

Loss of Masculinity in Modern Art

For a knight, chivalry is second to drawing a sword, seeking adventure, or slaying a dragon. Writing a poem for his love to profess his heart and logical reason for leaving his love was probably the first thing which came to mind the second he received his marching orders.

And, to be completely honest, it should have been.

Knights knew a thing or two about loving their women correctly. They understood in order to keep a woman they should communicate the responsibility for the role they have in society: to protect, defend, and provide. The way this knight acknowledges this role by stating he could not love his wife had he not loved and acted upon the responsibility he carries in society speaks a lot to the masculinity within Medieval culture. It can also illuminate the decline of masculinity in modern America.

For example, let us compare this poem to the number one song on the Billboard Hot 100 list sung by a male vocalist at the current time I am writing this:

My baby want a Birkin, she's been tellin' me all night long
Gasoline and groceries, the list goes on and on
This 9 to 5 ain't workin', why the hell do I work so hard?
I can't worry 'bout my problems, I can't take 'em when I'm gone, uh

Someone pour me up a double shot of whiskey
They know me and Jack Daniels got a history
There's a party downtown near Fifth Street
Everybody at the bar gettin' tipsy
Everybody at the bar gettin' tipsy
Everybody at the bar gettin' tipsy

I've been Boozey since I've left, I ain't changin' for a check
Tell my ma I ain't forget (oh, Lord)
Woke up drunk at 10 am, we gon' do this shit again
Tell your girl to bring a friend (oh, Lord)

Bar Song, Shaboozy, 2024

These lyrics might be the exact opposite of Lovelace’s verses above. The song details the relationship a man has with a woman who wants the world’s most expensive bag (a Birkin) then complains about bills stacking up “gasoline and groceries, the list goes on and on” (Shaboozy lines 1-2). The speaker of the song then enacts his grand plan to provide for his girl and fulfill his role in society, he goes to the bar.

The rest of the song reveals a complete disregard of the speaker’s duty, responsibility, and commitment in favor of debauchery, partying, and drinking.

What is so compelling about these lyrics is not necessarily the illustrations they illicit, it is the attitude the speaker has towards his counterproductive lifestyle. The speaker repeatedly fortifies his staunch belief that his lifestyle choices suits his needs and he will not change, “for a check” because he and “Jack Daniels got a history” and “woke up drunk at 10am” (Shaboozy lines 6, 11, 13). This worldview, which most modern American men follow, is starkly different to the lifestyle of great Medieval knights.

Leave a comment

Cessation

There is a loss of noble, valorous, gallant masculinity in American men. And I am not simply talking about basic table manners like opening the door, paying for meals, or offering to drive places, I am referring to true, Biblical masculinity. The kind of masculinity which the Lord innately grants young men, the kind of masculinity which women respond to best, the kind of masculinity which gives men the capacity to thrive, the kind of masculinity which secures the roles of men in society.

In Lovelace’s poem, “To Lucusta, Going to Wars” men are shown the fruit of Biblical masculinity. They are given a vision for what life could be like if they mirrored the knights of old. Choices rooted in honor, love, and sacrifice showcases their potential for success and a joy-filled life. Unlike the modern lyrics recited in the Billboard Top 100 song, Lovelace’s poem will actually help men to provide, protect, and defend just as Jesus does for His Bride.

Here’s a final note to modern American men who want a relationship like Lovelace’s gallant knight: If I, as a young woman, get to choose between a hot, responsible, sweet-talking, knight or an alcohol addict, I am going for the hot knight.

Now go please learn how to be one. <3

Works Cited

“Bar Song.” YouTube, Shaboozy, youtu.be/t7bQwwqW-Hc?feature=shared. Accessed 17 Oct. 2024.

Lovelace, Richard. “To Lucasta, Going to the Wars.” Poetry Foundation, Poetry Foundation, www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/44658/to-lucasta-going-to-the-wars. Accessed 17 Oct. 2024.

Tolsen. “Billboard Hot 100TM.” Billboard, Billboard, 8 Oct. 2024, www.billboard.com/charts/hot-100/.

“Medieval Fantasy in 2024: Medieval Art, Fairytale Art, Pre Raphaelite Art.” Pinterest, 15 Aug. 2024, www.pinterest.com/pin/21392166972723710/.